Lube FAIL!!!

Lube FAIL!!!

Nasty. I totally wish that could be my full review, because that is what the Hot + Sexy warming lubricant is. Nasty. It's gross.

Ok, so here is the actual review...unbiased and all.

Hot + Sexy lubricant comes in a 5 pack with a 1 oz. bottle of each flavor (hot cherry, vanilla, cinnamon, watermelon, and strawberry). I really do like the packaging. It is cute and effective and houses all the lubricants together. The whole package is very pink, which can be bad or good. I see it as good (but I have no issue buying ugly bottles of lube if the lubricant is effective). This pinkness of the pack is not intimidating for those who are looking to spice up their sessions but are easily embarrassed when buying the tools to do so. Plus, if I was not really open to a warming lube, and J brought this home, I might be more inclined to try it since it looks all frilly and shit (that's just me though).

The ingredients had me a little puzzled, I must admit. If you have allergies read each bottle individually. They all have glycerin (even though it isn't listed on the package...it is on the bottles) which can cause yeast infections for some women. If you don't like glycerin, keep that in mind. Also, if you are one who avoids anything with Red Dye 40 know this, Cinnamon, Cherry, and Strawberry all have Red Dye 40 in them...some people avoid this dye like the Black Plague. And the final ingredient that made me say "what the fuck?!?!" Caramel. Yeah, like glycerin wasn't enough...let's add caramel! Really? There wasn't a better ingredient? Caramel is in the Cherry flavor, so yeah...wow.

The Hot + Sexy lube is supposed to be a warming lubricant that gently warms up when blown on. Well, it does warm up...for a second. Certainly not long enough to be useful or pleasurable. The momentary warming was nice, but four seconds of warm does NOT make this a warming lubricant. Which brings me to my next point. Lube. Umm...no.

The lube is thin at best. More like a slightly thick water that has no staying power and needs to be reapplied. If this Hot + Sexy had a decent taste I might be apt to say thin is ok, as is reapplication. However, J said the taste was awful and to "toss that shit, it's fucking useless." Classy J, really.

Now, because J refused to use these lubes a second time...or finish up with me until I washed it all off, I had to taste test these all on my own. Ok...ding ding ding!!! I found the heat! It heated on my tongue, except...that isn't how they are supposed to work. Well, damn. As far as flavor...gross. Cinnamon, watermelon, and cherry are nasty. Watermelon is just fucking disgusting. They are bitter, warm, and have a gross aftertaste. Actually, they all have a pretty bitter aftertaste. Vanilla wasn't totally disgusting, but the aftertaste was enough to never make me use it again. Strawberry tastes like strawberry medicine...so, I guess if you like cough syrup...you're good with this one.

And then comes the water...really. Saliva makes a better lubricant than the Hot + Sexy lube. It has zero staying power. None. At. All. Hot + Sexy is runny at best and makes a huge sticky mess when used, then you have to clean up, but now you have lube everywhere, so you have to do laundry. So now sex, oral or any other kind has just become a giant cleanup process.

Overall, really? Just use saliva and incorporate fruit or something. Save the effort and money and get a better lubricant that isn't just a giant novelty joke. One that does what it claims to do.



A few hot alternative selections:
Warming and flavored: Wet Lotion
Warming, flavored multipack: Razzles
Warming and Glycerin free: System Jo
*Please not I have not tried these personally, but they get decent ratings from (well...Wet and Jo anyway) reviewers I trust.*

Thanks to Eden Fantasys for sending me this product to review.

$0.00Hot + Sexy warming lubricant Lubricant by Doc Johnson Buy from EdenFantasys

This product was provided free of charge to the reviewer.

Read More

Pink Water Based Lube

Pink Water Based Lube

So I had a chance to test the ever so popular PINK lube (water based of course) and I can honestly say I liked it. Not "I loved it," not "it was amazing," but just liked. Why? Well, it was lube. Sure, the bottle is all girly and nice, and there is no glycerin, but that is about it. Aside from those attributes it is like any other lube I own.

I was sure this would be revolutionary, but it wasn't and I was not amazed at all. There are still parabens in the lube, and it is made with Aspartame. Gross. It simply didn't last as long as some other water based lubricants that I already had on hand.

What is good about this particular lube is the bottle; it is discreet. You can leave it on the nightstand and no one will really question what it is because it doesn't look like WET or KY. There is no crazy smell, and it is totally awful tasting (in case you feel the urge to give some oral after use). There is a distinct bitter taste to the lubricant.

Pink Water comes in a small bottle that looks like it might be a lotion or a soap bottle, complete with a pump dispenser (which J totally broke off 0= ) and a small travel cap that snaps back in place after use. The dispenser drops about a small pea size ball of lubricant on to you.

I wasn't pleased with the consistency of the Pink Water, that is my opinion though. It is very thin and runny, and I do prefer a thicker lubricant. I have found that thickness equals versatility in a lubricant. I like all of my lubes to be good for anal play if needed in a pinch.

Overall, the Pink Water Lubricant is simply so-so. It is good if you like a runny lube that is discreet, but I really prefer functionality over aesthetics. You can get yours (and other sex toys) at Fascinations.

Read More

BabeLicious Lubricant

BabeLicious Lubricant

Babeland sent me a bottle of their BabeLicious lubricant in Chocolate Orange flavor. The BabeLicious line reminds me of a high end line of products. Not in looks or packaging, but rather in the actual product itself. I was very impressed.

BabeLicious is a water based, glycerin, and paraben free flavored lubricant that is safe to use with all toys and during sex. I have to say though, I loved using this for oral. The flavor was so amazing and it added just a little bit of fun. And since it isn't super ridiculous thin like most flavored lubes I have tried (they are usually like colored water), it actually worked like a real lubricant. I won't go as far as to say that it is like a woman's natural lubricant, because it isn't, but it wasn't all gross like most of them are.

We were able to use the lube with a condom, and it never gave up on me. I will say that if the lubricant dries it will get tacky and you will need to add a little water to it to reactivate it. The lubricant avoids stickiness (and the whole yeast infection causing nastiness) by being glycerin free. BabeLicious is not overly sweet; the taste is light...more like a scent than an actual taste to it. It worked really well orally for me. Now, the scent does linger after washing...which is weird, but whatever. As long as it tastes as good as it does, I don't really care about the scent lingering, plus it kept my girly bits smelling delightful.

It comes in a 2 oz flip top tube (kind of like a short thick toothpaste tube) that is simple and discreet. You can leave it on your bedside table and it will look like a hand lotion from afar, so don't panic that people will know what is by your bed.

Thanks to Babeland for sending me this product in exchange for a review.

Read More

i-Vibe and Toyfluid

i-Vibe and Toyfluid

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Read More

Moonlight Serenade Kit

Moonlight Serenade Kit

Butt plugs, cock rings? What? Lube? Well, ok, most people use lube...but still. I had the chance to review the Moonlight Serenade Kit, and although the name is stupid...well IT IS, I was very pleased with the kit. Let's begin with the fact that it comes with the Bootie Butt Plug by Fun Factory, a Screaming O Vibrating Ring, and a packet of Please Gel Lube (which is, of course water based). To top all that off the whole kit is only $33. The Bootie alone is normally $34...yeah.

So I will begin with the Please Gel Lube, because we all know I have random bottles of lube stashed throughout the house and just have to have like ten bottles on hand at all times...because God forbid I run out of lube. Ok, so...for anyone, and I mean anyone who likes, or even doesn't like lubricant, this is a must have. I know, all you girls are all like "oh my gawd, no, I am always wet and slick!" Liar. I love sex, but my vagina doesn't always agree with me, so I use personal lubricants. The Please Gel Lubricant is a water based and massively thick lube that guarantees vaginal dryness is not going to get in your way of a good time. Seriously, I have tried it, and I know this to be a fact. Since it is water based it can be used with any and all toys, and washes away in water easily. The only downside to that is that shower sex can be difficult. The thickness of the gel allows you to put the lube on and not get a nasty mess and drip all over the damn place. It stays in place and is amazing for anal use. Since it is thick and stays put you don't have to use a half a bottle trying to ensure there is enough lubricant on the toy or whatthehellever your are sticking in your ass (whatever it is, it had better be anal safe if you are an avid reader of my blog). It is also glycerin and paraben free for those who have more sensitivities. I do still prefer silicone lube for anal play when my toys are compatible with it though...just sayin'.

The Screaming O Vibrating ring is your basic cock ring, it fits around the cock and balls and it vibrates (or, basic rings don't vibrate, you caught me). Let me begin with I really don't care for companies that say they are silicone when it is only partially so. The ring is made of "SEBS Silicone," no, wait...coated in. SEBS is nothing more that TPR Silicone blend. Google it. Not that it really matters as this is meant to be a disposable toy, but hey, I like information. The ring is really stretchy, honestly I was sure it would snap (it didn't). The bullet can actually be removed and replaced, but the ring isn't likely to last you very long after the one 30 minute use you get out of it. There is and on/off switch, so if you have a quickie, you can still use it again. The bullet can be aimed up so that the female (in my case anyway) gets clitoral stimulation while the male gets the prolonged erection and light vibrations. Honestly this only works well for me in a few positions where I am extremely close to J. You can also flip the ring and the vibrations can be solely for the wearer. This offers more intense orgasms for your partner as well as the prolonged erection. Do be careful with these and keep scissors around in case you notice any popped blood vessels...they can happen with these stretchy type rings from time to time.

The Bootie, the entire reason this set is so. fucking. amazing. The Bootie us a small ('round abouts three inches long and an inch thick at the widest spot) butt plug made by Fun Factory. It is solid silicone (no silicone based lube) and is very bendable and extremely comfortable. The base, rather than a large round one, is a long line that is made to nestle comfortable between the cheeks. This is a great plug for a beginner or anyone who wants to have prolonged wear time. It is curved (most likely for prostate massage, but I think it may be too small for that) and the neck is thin enough for even the most inexperienced users.

The Moonlight Serenade Kit is perfect for anyone who is looking to try a few toys out on a low budget. You get two toys and a great lube to use. If you are looking to venture into new areas of sexuality this is a great way to start without breaking the bank. Get the Moonlight Serenade Kit and other sex toys at Good Vibrations.

*This product was provided free of charge in exchange for an honest review*

Read More

Sassy Booty Formula

Sassy Booty Formula

I will begin with the fact that I have never before tried an anal lubricant. So, basically I have nothing other than your basic water based and silicone based lubes to compare Sassy Booty Formula to. That being said...I must admit I really like this lubricant. I was totally skeptical about it at first, but I like Sliquid so much I had to try it at least once. Let's take a quick look at the ingredients, shall we?

Purified Water, Plant Cellulose, Polyquat 007, DMDM Hydantoin

Ok, now...take a quick glance at the H2O ingredients really quickly please:

Purified Water, Plant Cellulose, Polyquat 007, DMDM Hydantoin

Makes you wonder, right? Yeah, me too. Guess what? They are not the same. Sliquid Sassy is thick, gel like even, while H2O was watery and thinner. It has serious staying power. There is no glycerin and there are no parabens. I had absolutely no discomfort, no burning, and no yeast infection (yes, I had to try it vaginally as well) from using this lubricant. Sliquid Sassy is surprisingly thick, especially considering it is a water based lubricant. I know because I checked, repeatedly.

I prefer water based lubricants because of the chemical compatibility of it with my silicone toys, and having a water based anal lube is great because I never need to worry about ruining my favorite toys with silicone lube again. Now, I won't lie, Sassy did dry up a little faster than my silicone lube, but that is ok. It did out perform every water based lubricant I have ever used before in my life. Plus, I have only had to reapply once during an extended play session.

Now, Sassy is not a desensitizing lubricant. And, to be honest, if you own some...get rid of it. Desensitizing is not safe due to the fact that you are less likely to feel true discomfort that would normally be an indicator of a more serious problem. So you will feel the stretching and whatnot of anal play, but go slow and be careful and you should have a great time.

My only complaint is the cap. I have come to appreciate pump systems because of the drip type spout everyone else uses tenancy to leak. My other Sliquid bottle leaked so badly I had to put the lubricant into a whole new container just to be safe. This particular bottle hasn't leaked, but I still prefer pump style lubes.

It even comes in a cutesy light blue and pink bottle. Now, I know this isn't for everyone, but...Some people may find anal play to be a nerve racking thing, and some of the lubricants can tend to look really tough. This lightens the look of anal play, and, for me anyway, can make it seem less intimidating. Also, because there is no taste or smell it is user friendly to oral sex as well.

This is a great started lubricant to anyone who is interested in anal play. Since there is no desensitizing aftermath, and it is safe for use on all toys (pair it with glass or metal for a silky smooth ride), you get a great amount of lubricant for the price (although you may need to note that you can't take it on a plane until you have transferred bottles because the smallest bottle is still over 3oz.), it is long lasting, and Sassy is super thick. I would honestly recommend Sliquid Sassy to anyone at all.

Read More