Just....no

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Just....no

Ok, so I have mulled over this review long enough. I have tried everything I can think of to enjoy my latest toy from California Exotics. The nice people at Cal Exotics sent me the Support Plus Extended Ring Head Exciter for a Sexpert review.

Let me tell you, when I opened the box and saw the toy my head fell as I shook it. This is not the type of toy J and I would ever {even in a million years} would purchase, so I was beyond lost. I am well aware of my natural aversion to these toy types. I put all my preconceived thoughts aside as I opened the box and washed of the toy. The first issue I had with the Exciter was the material {TPR}. As great as TPR can be, let's be honest...it sucks if you have any form of pubic hair. TPR is sticky, and sticky pulls out hair OUCH.

A few notes on the toy itself in case you may be wondering.

• There are two half circles in the base that are made of steel {I am guessing they kind of act like a cock ring}. I would have liked a whole ring, but that is just me.

• There are three steel pleasure nubs in the TPR on the shaft {I got no enjoyment from them because of the TPR sticking to me}. These are pronounced enough that {with enough lube} they should offer enjoyment though.

• TPR ~ You can use either water based or silicone based lubricants with this material.
• The width is about 1.5 inches...I got mine stretched over 3 inches {you wish boys...you wish}

So, I tried this in multiple ways...including as a pleasure sleeve on some toys...no. Just no. When there was a ton of lube on the toy I was able to enjoy it for a few seconds, but that never lasted long before hairs were torn out. I really tried to have J try it, but he just laughed and said "you've lost your fucking mind." Well, that wasn't very nice, now was it? Apparently my screams and yelps of agony were enough to deter him from being remotely willing to help with the review at all. I suppose with some lube a man could slip this on, but then I would worry about it slipping off, or even being able to get it off without pain.

I am truly sorry I wasn't able to provide a better response to this toy {and if I run across other reviews of it I will certainly post them as links...Sexperts only though}. I would normally offer up a "this toy would be better if..." but I just can't think of anything that could improve this particular design for me... :(

Thank you California Exotics for allowing me to review this toy!