Hard boiled eggs anyone?

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Hard boiled eggs anyone?

When I opened my inbox to see a Couture Collection Bliss assigned to me only 3 minutes after stating I would willingly be Eden Fantasys' review bitch I was shocked. I mean shocked. This is a hot item people, seriously. I own a few items from the Couture Collection, and I love them...so this is a great addition to my collection.

The Bliss is an egg shaped vibe that is rechargeable. Oh, and it is remote controlled as well. So, do you see why these are flying off the shelves? I have the Amante as well, but this is so much nicer because I don't need three random sized batteries. I do need one odd sized battery (12V) for the remote, but that is no big deal really...you can buy them at Walmart or CVS or something like that. Just pick up a few...they should last you a while.

The Bliss is plastic, and therefore can be used with any type of lubricant, but it needs to be covered when sharing because you just never know. The cord is nylon (not a fan of that at all...I wish it was a solid silicone toy, but vibrations don't travel as well). Oh, and just because there is a retrieval cord does not make this safe for anal play!!! Just a quick warning. If it gets lost in your ass I will laugh...loudly. Then I will tweet it and post it to Facebook. You have been warned.

The egg (really...it looks like an egg) is 2.5 inches long and 1.5 inches thick. That may not seem big to you, but GOOD GODS IN HEAVEN ABOVE, that is massive if you ask me. My largest vaginal ball is 1 inch thick and it is too big to be comfortable in me...so wearing this out to dinner is a no go for me...aww. But, I can wear it around the house and such and give J the controller (that was such a bad idea). I would be in the kitchen and he would be across the apartment and he'd set it off. Nice, but it was a ton of fun to play with (note: apartment...about 20 foot distance). Ooh...and about the size...if you don't have strong muscles and are worried about it falling out, I wouldn't. It is large enough to stay in with little to no effort at all.

One true enjoyment for me was having it in and on while I was using a clitoral vibrator. This gave me vaginal stimulation while giving me something to orgasm around. It added more sensation to my solo time.

Ok...the run down:

The whole kit comes with:

• The egg
• A charging dock (shaped like a heart)
• The remote
• A battery for the remote
• The plug for the charging dock

To use, just plug the dock in and place the egg in the dock. Once the little light on the egg is green, you're good to go.

How it works:

The remote is stupid proof. Really. There is a dedicated on/off switch and the other one just changes the settings. The egg has a small button that you hold for about 4 seconds (it will turn green) to turn it on, and another 4 to turn it off (it will go red). The settings just cycle through, and to turn it off just use the power button. There are 7 settings in all:

• Low
• Medium
• High
• Escalating from low to high repeatedly
• Pulsing
• Fast pulsations
• 3 short pulses and a longer buzz

Batteries:

Ok, I am annoyed that we need a special battery for the remote...but whatever. The egg, however actually holds a decent charge. We used it for about 2.5 to 3 hours and it was still good to go (not all at once though). The initial charging took about 2 hours(ish), it was green after that so I have to assume it was fully charged. The instruction book gave no indication of how long to charge it the first go. I was mildly tweeked that the instruction book wasn't more thorough, but it really isn't a huge deal.

In actual use:

Well, I did like it...the thing is...
I found the vibrations to be kind of loud. J says they aren't as loud as I think, but to me they sound really loud, and I worry others will hear them. He said as long as there is some background noise they can't be heard, so I guess all is good there. Maybe I am just paranoid that people will wonder why I am buzzing from my vagina...I dunno. I am quirky like that. The vibrations are strong, but I have felt stronger ones (this may be due to the rechargeable feature). I don't mind it being the level it is because, any stronger would mean louder...that, dear readers, could would be bad.

Cleaning and care:

The Bliss is waterproof. No shit, right? Because if it wasn't I would really think twice before inserting it all the way. Since it's waterproof you can just run it under some warm water with a good toy cleaner and be done. Remember to get the cord clean as well, though. You can also wipe it down with alcohol to disinfect it if you want to. Just go the extra distance, you know?


Overall, I am pleased to own this vibrator, and I will continue to love the Couture Collection pieces. Cal Exotics has outdone themselves...well done!